The skill of asking questions is part of communication skills.
People say: “If you don't know, ask; if you want to excel, learn.”. In life and at work, there are countless things we do not know. So how can we learn about and address them in the most optimal and effective way? What value can the skill of asking questions bring you as you solve problems?
1. What is the skill of asking questions?
The skill of asking questions is the way you maintain a coherent conversation. During the conversation, you ask multiple questions to gather information around the focus you have set. Through the other person, you obtain answers to the things you want to know.
2. The benefits of asking effective questions
When someone helps you once, there is a strong likelihood that they will continue helping you in the future. The way you ask questions or seek support from others while encouraging them to share enthusiastically can be described as an art of communication.
- Get answers to your questions from others.
- Expand your knowledge and understanding.
- Have more options and ways to handle problems.
- This skill promotes communication, discussion, and the exchange of ideas among people.
- Maintain relationships with the people around you.
- Asking questions benefits not only the person asking. It also gives the person being asked an opportunity to revisit their own knowledge. They may come up with new and valuable ideas when faced with thoughtful questions or questions about perspectives they have never considered.
- Asking questions and being curious about everything around you are the starting points for discovery and awareness of change.
3. How to ask intelligent questions.
3.1. Identify the central issue
It is natural to ask questions because you have something you need to know or understand. You need to identify the central issue so you can ask appropriate questions.
Sometimes you need to begin with open-ended questions and guide the other person toward the issue you want to explore. A conversation is not an interrogation between two people. There needs to be continuity between statements and questions. Therefore, guiding the conversation to gather information and asking questions at the right moment will make it more productive.
3.2. Determine the right number of questions to gather information
Do not ask too many questions, and especially avoid questions that ramble or stray from the topic. High-quality questions show the other person that you have a basic understanding of the issue. They can sense that you are missing information and genuinely want to know more about what you have asked.
3.3. Ask questions
When asking questions, there should be a connection between one question and the next. The next question can explore the answer the other person has just given. Avoid asking questions that are too disconnected. This can make the person being asked feel that you are too rigid and are simply asking questions to complete an agenda without truly receiving or engaging with their answers.
Questions should be asked at an appropriate moment in the flow of the conversation. This requires the questioner to be perceptive and tactful. Follow-up questions can make the other person feel heard and respected for what they have shared.
There are many questioning strategies for tense situations or circumstances in which asking a direct question is difficult. Choosing the type of question and the order in which to ask questions is an art in itself.
3.4. Think about and assess the answer, then respond positively
Do not keep asking questions without acknowledging what the other person has contributed.
Have you noticed that many presenters ask their guests questions? Obviously, these questions are not intended for the presenters themselves. Their purpose is to obtain answers for television viewers. However, when presenters ask questions without responding to the answers, the conversation can feel disconnected. Both the guest and the viewers can sense the awkwardness and lack of engagement.
Engaging directly makes it easier to consider the answer and respond. Respond positively so the other person can feel that you are learning from them. You should have a sufficient knowledge base to assess what the other person is saying.
In reality, no one wants to answer someone who has no understanding of what they are talking about.
3.5. Respect and listen sincerely to the other person
When you ask someone a question, it means you are genuinely interested in learning what they know. Respect and listen to the speaker, even if you have your own opinion.
You will not necessarily receive a satisfactory answer from everyone you ask. Diverse opinions can give you a new perspective and a new direction for solving problems. Respecting their opinion means respecting another value that you may not yet know.
3.6. Summarize what you understand with the person being questioned
This shows that you have truly grasped what the person said. Rather than ending superficially, summarizing the discussion provides a perfect conclusion to a meaningful dialogue.
4. The relationship between emotional intelligence (EQ) and questioning skills
Emotional intelligence (EQ) whose full name is Emotional Quotient, is an index that reflects a person's emotional intelligence. EQ also refers to the ability to recognize one's own emotions and those of others. This makes it easier to adjust and change one's behavior to suit specific situations and conditions.
- With high emotional intelligence, you will communicate what you want to say clearly.
- Recognize and regulate your emotions and attitude while asking questions.
- Listen to, analyze, and respond positively to the information provided by the other person.
- Recognize the other person's emotional state and adjust your approach to the questions appropriately.
5. Conclusion
Questioning skills are among the soft skills that need to be cultivated. They support the building, maintenance, and expansion of relationships. At the same time, they allow you to gain other people's knowledge and experience before applying them to solve your own problems.
Practicing questioning skills builds the habit of analyzing and exploring everything around you. When you develop curiosity and an interest in learning, useful and diverse knowledge will come to you.
Learn more about tools that support the development of capabilities and skills in life and work:
- Trait-Map Report (Professional Personality Map)
- Uchida-Kraepelin Test (Measuring Performance and Work Capacity)
- MQ Test (Measuring Work Motivation)
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